How Your Stuff is Holding You Back & What to Do About it

Let’s talk about clutter. You know, that pile of random stuff in the corner you keep meaning to deal with but never do? Yeah, that. Clutter isn’t just a physical annoyance—it’s like an emotional backpack full of rocks, weighing you down in ways you might not even realize.

The Hidden Costs of Clutter

Here’s the deal: clutter equals stress. Studies have found that living in a messy space cranks up your cortisol (that’s your stress hormone) and leaves you feeling frazzled. And decision fatigue? Oh, it’s real. Every out-of-place item demands attention, and before you know it, you’re too drained to decide what’s for dinner, let alone where to put those shoes.

Clutter also messes with your productivity. That messy desk? It’s sabotaging your focus. And don’t even get me started on the time we waste hunting for lost stuff. Plus, relationships can take a hit. Ever argued with a partner about the clutter? Or avoided inviting friends over because your space feels like a disaster zone? You’re not alone.

Why We Get Emotionally Attached to Items

Let’s get real: we’re all a little sentimental about our stuff. Maybe that old T-shirt reminds you of a great concert, or the chipped mug was a gift from someone special. Our things tell stories, but sometimes, we’re holding onto stuff for the wrong reasons—guilt, nostalgia, or a “just in case” mentality.

Here’s the thing: keeping something just because it’s tied to a memory doesn’t mean you’re honoring it. Recognizing these emotional ties can help you let go of what’s no longer serving you.

Decluttering isn’t just about tidying up; it’s about creating space for a life that feels good.

Detaching emotionally from clutter can feel challenging, especially when items hold sentimental value or represent memories.

How to detach from things:

1. Reframe Your Thinking

• Memories Aren’t in Things: Recognize that the memory or meaning of an item exists within you, not the object itself. Letting go doesn’t mean you lose the experience it represents.

• Value Over Volume: Shift your mindset to focus on the few items that truly bring you joy or serve a purpose, rather than feeling obligated to keep everything.

2. Start Small

• Begin with a single drawer, shelf, or category (e.g., clothes, books, kitchen gadgets). Seeing progress builds confidence.

• Set a timer for 10-15 minutes to avoid overwhelm. Small wins add up.

3. Ask Yourself Questions

• “Do I use this regularly or love it?”

• “Would I buy this today?”

• “Does this align with the life I want to create?”

4. Create Distance

• If you’re unsure about something, place it in a “maybe box.” Store it out of sight for a set time (e.g., 30 days). If you don’t miss it or think about it, it’s easier to let go.

5. Focus on the Benefits

• Imagine how your space will feel without clutter—calmer, more organized, and less stressful.

• Embrace the idea of giving items a new life with someone who needs or appreciates them more than you do.

6. Let Go of Guilt

• Release the sense of obligation to keep gifts or inherited items. Their purpose was to bring joy, and you’re not dishonoring anyone by letting go.

• Donate or pass items on to someone who will truly use them—this can feel more meaningful than holding on.

7. Celebrate the Process

• Take photos of items before you part with them if it helps you feel connected to the memory.

• Reward yourself after each decluttering session with something simple, like a cup of tea or a moment of gratitude for your lighter space.

8. Seek Inspiration

• Follow minimalist or decluttering influencers for motivation. Seeing others’ journeys can help you feel less alone.

• Read books like The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo or Goodbye, Things by Fumio Sasaki for fresh perspectives.

Remember, decluttering is a process, not a one-time event. Be patient and kind to yourself as you navigate it. You’re not just clearing space—you’re creating room for the life you want to live.